Stranger: Wow your hair is gorgeous!
Me: Thanks, it has pockets.
This dress from Brooks Brothers (CURRENTLY HAVING THEIR SEMI ANNUAL SALE) is hands down perfect. Perfect for work, weekends, casual events, summer cocktail events, anything. I love plaid, and in the weave is shimmery gold threading, giving this classic pattern an upscale vibe. There' subtle ruffles, giving it that summer feel over a winter feel, and although the dress comes with a matching plaid belt,
I decided to give it some contrast with a skinny red leather belt. It also has pockets!
I believe all dresses should have pockets. 1: it's functional 2: if you put stuff in them, it weighs down the dress, and keeps it from blowing up (unless you're aiming for the Marilyn Monroe effect).
Just like this dress, everyone has their own little pockets filled with weights. I'm talking about baggage. I personally feel 'damaged' because I don't just have "exes" I have an ex husband in the mix. I feel like I have a red flag waving overhead saying "DO NOT DATE." But I'm not the only one out there with failed relationships. Megan Markle is a KWEEN (okay, duchess), and she was also previously married. I feel extremely self conscious in talking with friends about exes: "My ex, no not the ex husband, the ex boyfriend..... no not the recent ex, the ex-ex." Of course with friends I'm using actual names, so it's not actually that confusing, but this is what I feel like I'm saying: "No not my first failure, my second failure.... no not my recent failure, the other failure.... I'm failing at love." When I don't know someone that well and I'm sharing an "ex story" I keep it very general—I don't let people know I use to be married.
Baggage is something we all have, but it's what shapes us, keeps us grounded, and necessary for a healthier future relationship. I know now how I want and do not want to be treated because of my past. I also find it extremely sexy and courageous when someone knows about my history, and they look past all of it. Stephen (my ex boyfriend), looked past all of it, and would always try to have me open up, but it was hard to talk about, I was more embarrassed than anything. I find in dating and on Bumble, I become blissfully blind that someone may have a past or could be dating other people. But it should be more than ignoring someone's baggage, it's lending them a hand with it; trying to understand and listen on what went wrong and how to avoid that if you truly care about this person.
Although I'm no pro at online dating, or just dating in general, I do know I'm VERY OPEN on this blog and I think it does deter some possible chances. I wonder how many guys that may have been possibly interested in me, do their research/read about me, and then decide not to pursue anything. Well, their loss, I have an awesome cat and a beautiful collection of dresses.