Romancing a comeback: if it comes back in style, is it just as good?
Several people in my life have pointed out, I'm nostalgic for a past that never was. I have a weird obsession with the 90s, especially 90s coming of age movies. I don't know why, it just brings me back to a time when I felt innocent and carefree, and love was still a hopeful objective, and the perfect guy would show up in an overdramatic way, because flowers at your doorstep is too basic. Now, I would kill for someone to show up at my doorstep with flowers (marries Telaflora delivery guy). I got the chance to experience my past (well sort of), I attended a 90s boat cruise with my friend and photographer, Keir (seen below), and needless to say, it wasn't my cup of tea.
I thought the boat cruise was going to be more like this one bar I frequent that has 90s nights, Common Ground. I've been to the Common Ground in Allston a dozen of times, and I'm telling you, it's the last place in America for "good clean fun." It's a bunch of kids (I think the average age there is 22.... I'm 28 and definitely one of the oldest people there), who can't dance, screaming at the top of their lungs to the "DJ's" Now 1-10 CDs. I LOVE Common Ground. So naturally, I thought this boat party would be the same, but it was very similar to what I actually experienced in the 90s. I wouldn't say I grew up too fast, but I definitely didn't have a tame childhood. I was obsessed with sex, stealing alcohol from my parents cabinet, music video vixens and learning to dance like them. This boat cruise party was a bunch of young girls grinding in Chucky Finster crop tops, destroying the imaginary innocence of my childhood. It was an overcrowded boat, slippery floors, and the start of a whole new Teen Mom spin-off. Now, before you picture my 11-year-old self as an alcoholic downloading porn off of Napster (I used Kazaa) on a boat, I wasn't completely this little rebel without a cause; but it's funny how when you remember things it's how you want to remember it, not how things actually were. My school dances were very similar to this boat party: a bunch of kids trying get casted for a Busta Rhymes music video, in an overcrowded, poorly monitored school.
Romanticizing the past is something we all do, and I can't figure out if it's a good thing. It's not quite like denial, and as unhealthy, but the willingness to avoid the truth and remain optimistic. I hate when friends bash exes, when they weren't all that bad, because it's the "supportive" thing to do, but I'm also a hypocrite and hate hearing friends idealize men who weren't right for them. I'm trying not to bash anyone, and roll with the storyteller's emotions. My roommate has been dating a guy casually (she gets more action with a broken leg, than I do with 2 working ones) and if I say something negative about him, she'll get defensive. Meanwhile she points out of his flaws on her own just fine, same thing with pretty much all of her exes. The last thing you want is someone shattering the illusion you have of what was good, but at the same time you want to be conscious that you're not wearing rose colored glasses. Also, if history repeats itself, seeing how the 90s are in style, can past exes come back in style? And if it does make a comeback, is it really just as good as you remembered?
I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'm still going to go to Common Ground and love it, but keeping the romance and the reality in check. So, enjoy my all white Backstreet Boy style circa 1999.
Also, because this is a fashion blog, these new Me Too loafers from Nordstrom are the comfiest things I've ever owned.